100 THINGS YOU WILL NEVER SEE IRUKA DO!!


1. french kiss Kakashi in the middle of Konoha
2. say "how you doin'?" in a New Jersey accent
3. smack Kakashi on the butt and say "hey big boy."
4. declare he is tired of his current look and get his hair layered
5. buy a goldfish and tell it every night how much he loves Kakashi
6. Declaire his undieing love for Kakashi, Itachi, Kisame, Orochimaru, Kabuto, Gai, or any other
man in konoha
7. do 200 laps around konoha backwards on his hands
8. start wearing a green jumpsuit and orange leg-warmers
9. declaire Maito Gai as his 'baby-daddy'
10. drop a water balloon on the Hokage's head from the window above
11. start wearing all black saying "my life sucks." all the time
12. put his headband over his eyes and try not to walk into anything
13. attempt the 'sexy-no-jutsu'
14. go on a mass crusade to get Kakashi to show his whole face
15. wear red shiny leather pumps
16. dance in Kakashi's underwear
17. sing 'I'm a barbie girl' in a karioke bar
18. inform Orochimaru that he is the Michael Jackson on Konoha
19. beg Jiraya to let him be one of his bitches
20. hide in a closet just to pop out and scream "LOOK I'M COMING OUT OF THE CLOSET LOL."
21. start saying "datte bayo!!" at the end of every sentence
22. start saying "desu!" at the begining and end of every sentence.
23. accidently fall into a wall and nock it over to reveal the set of Fullmetal Alchemist
24. draw  a transmutation circle and attempt alchemy
25. change his name to Bambi and try to get a job at the local strip club
26. pop out of a birthday cake
26. grab a pencil and erace the scar from his face or try to cover it with make-up
27. take up the sport of tennis
28. stand up in front of all of Konoha and say "I have a confession to make..." and flash a dolphin
tattoo on his butt
29. get drunk with Kakashi, Gai and Asuma and wake up naked in Mexico
30. be enticed to go to Candy Mountain by two retarded unicorns  
31. join a NaruSasu fanclub saying, "What!? Everyone's doing it."
32. jump on top of a chair because he is afraid of the mouse on the floor
33. Google himself
34. smash a soda can on his forehead
35. stuff his shirt and say "I feel pretty!"
36. cry at the end of the movie 'A Walt to Remember.'
37. get a tomogatchi and cry when it dies
38. quit being a shinob to open a hampster farm
39. cosplay Vash the Stampede
40. attempt to lick his elbow
41. speak only in metaphores like "man, that guy is as happy as Michael Jackson in a daycare."
42. say the phrase "What happens in Vages, stays in Vages."
43. Go to Buckingham Palace and try to make the guards move
44. attempt to become the next white rapper
45. rollerskate in a mini skirt
46. read Cosmo to lear how to please his man
47. get as close as possible to Kakashi's ear and whisper "I see dead people."
48. win a stuffed fox plushie in a pie eating contest
49. jump into the Hokage's arms yelling "DADDY!!!" at the top of his lungs
50. paint his nail black and try to hang out with Itachi
51. inform Kakashi that he makes him feel like a natural woman
52. walk around in Sakura's jeans insisting that they look better on him anyway
53. whoop the n00bs asses at DnD(dungons and dragons)
54. pull up next to Kakashi in a pink corvette and say "Hey big boy, goin' my way?"
55. ask Jiraya to autograph his copy of Come Come Paradice
56. tell someone he can't hang out with him cause he has to check his myspace
57. put on a pair on Wranglers and a Stetson and yell "SAVE A HORSE RIDE A COWBOY!!"
58. try out for America's Next Top Model
59. challenge Tidus to a Chokabo race
60. sing along with "Who Let the Dogs Out" every time it comes on the radio
61. inform his whole class that they suck at life and will never amount to anything
62. become a vantriliqest for kids partys
63. walk up to someone who just said somthing stupid and yell "HERES YOUR SIGN"
64. attempt to write the great american novel
65. watch Pride and Prejudice then say "You have bewitched me body and soul." to the very next
person he sees
66. wait in a line for four hours to ride the teacup ride at Disney World
67. refer to Kakashi as 'The Silver Fox'
68. ask Ino if he can be the top florist in her family's flower shop
69. wear spandex in a bright primary color
70. yell "I CAN'T OR MARIO WILL DIE!!" when somone asks him to turn off his gameboy
71. swallow a live goldfish on a dare
72. buy a dolphin and keep it in his bathtub and when people ask tell them its his brother
73. mud wrestle
74. use his ninja powers to poof into Kakashi's shower
75. shave Lees eyebrows while he sleeps
76. rob a hospital gift shop taking only the beanie babys
77. dress up as Harry Potter for Halloween
78. wear a Spice Girls T-shirt
79. demand to know if these doughnuts are dolphin safe
80. walk up to Shikamaru and say "No Shikamaru, I AM your father!! bum bum bum." in a creepy
voice
81. ask Tsunade where babys come from
82. ask Gaara how he achieves such straight lines with his liquid eyeliner
83. name his kids Bo and Luke
84. play 'Naruto Clash of Ninja' on the PS2 and say "That looks nothing like me!" When he sees himself.
85. repeatedly ask "are we there yet?" when only walking a few feet
86. inform people that he has three pierceings and ask them to guess where they are
87. buy every season of Gilmore Girls on DVD
89. draw eyebrows on Gaara when hes asleep
90. ask Zabuza how many cows had to die for him to look that stupid
91. amaze a party crowd with his knowledge of random facts
92. try to set a world record for most oragami cranes made out of toilet paper
93. spike Naruto's ramen
94. open the only booth in Konoha that sells frenchfries
95. become addicted to blueberry miffins
96. wear a 'parental advisory, mature content' T-shirt
97. sell his body to science
98. pose for a playgirl calendar
99. become a porn star
100. ask Kakashi if he would like to see his 'hidden leaf'